shutter to think

Where I work (a car dealership), a pamphlet, bookmark and postcard were created and issued that bear a pretty sh*tty close-up of my honking face. They're promo items for a tutoring center I worked at, and the pic was one of several taken on a day last yearling where I sat and "edu-created" with a poor boy in front of a computer. We actually just tilted our heads a lot and typed "what should we be doing? hi hi hi ifhksjysrubds" while the photographer crouched and snapped. Tigers can crouch and snap too, I hear. They made a movie about it.

I tried to steal the bulk of the little papercutters from the storage room but they keep fluttering into my life. This is an anti-brag, in case you were wondering, and not some attempt to get you all hot in the brain imagineering what such splendid items could possibly look like. Old students leave them taped to my office door...I got one today with my front tooth blacked out (not the first time) and the note "DUDE, MS. D!" scribbled over my photohead, surrounded by hearts. Old professors have them strategically placed next to their class hours in the main hall. What I'm sayin' is this: find one, give it to me, and I will give you one American Dollar. The paperchase be on.

Also, have you ever wondered how many times you've been on the road next to an underage kid who's stolen their parent's ride?

fell on 2005-02-24 at 2:11 p.m.

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