man meats

Less REPRESSION and more DIGRESSION!

Meaning, I stole 55 packs of Sweet 'n Low from the newspaper faculty's lounge, hid it all in a styrofoam cup, and topped the pile with a crinkled blue napkin to LOOK LIKE ACTUAL BLUE WATER FOR A GIRL'S HEALTHY SIPPING MOUTH. Fooled you paid professionals with your stash of 'private sweetener' ha ha. I mean, gulp gulp water is good for me.

Also, an old man walked through Subway today to pass out hand-clipped PennnySaver coupons for $1 off all sandwiches. He managed to do this without sexpest vibe, pedolover vibe, crazy vibe, any of the other sticky man vibes. He just was like "here you go, save some money next go-round ok bye." Good job. Have some of my Baked Lays next time, my treat.

...and no, I'm not a Baked Lay! Shut your hole. Everyone knows I'm pale skinned like a dewy albino doe.

fell on 2003-12-02 at 1:36 p.m.

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